There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
me + whiskey = a bad person
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
