dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
