Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
It's never too late to be topless.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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