is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
