I wish life had little blips of pornography
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize