I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
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