Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Randomize
