Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
