Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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