do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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