If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Randomize
