Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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