it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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