I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
