Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I enjoy the company of your penis
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
