Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
