Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
