Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
this just has baby written all over it
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Come see our sink grown plant.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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