redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
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