it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
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I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
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oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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