i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Randomize
