There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize