We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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