whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize