He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Do vagina's smell?
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
