Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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