I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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