I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
