Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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