coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
