Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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