apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
