I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
