it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
