i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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