DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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