The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize