Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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