This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
