I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.