Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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