that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Randomize
