i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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