does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
