Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
