dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
