Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
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