Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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