would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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