Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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