Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
